Monday, January 9, 2017

20 Random Thoughts About Random Stuff

No one should look this happy doing what this guy does. 

1. Why is the way people put toilet paper on the spindle a thing? This has been a thing even back when I was a little kid and read about the big debate in Dear Abby (I was precocious). Who cares what way the toilet paper roll is put on? The important thing is that there's a toilet paper roll and one to spare.

2. A president needs to realize that part of the job is that people will criticize and poke fun at you. Especially if you're the one that likes to do it to others. So either ignore it, apologize for your stupidity with grace, or grab a sense of humor from somewhere, anywhere.

3. I'm watching my sugar intake. That includes chocolate. I hate people now.

4. I'm exercising in the morning too. Before work. Which means I have to be up even earlier. I hate people now.
Random orange orangutan.

5. I'm grateful I'm Canadian. I think it's the racist in me. Turns out I don't like fair haired orange people. Or maybe that's just one orange person.

6. Someday my Prince will come. But with my luck it will be an incontinent Rottweiler that thinks it's a chihuahua - named Prince.

7. A handsome salesman of around my age came to the store I worked at and was totally charming. And married. We both know the flirting and compliments were completely fake.

8. Rape is bad. Sexual assault is bad. It's just bad. Supporting people who do it...well that's bad too.

9. America...three steps forward, ten steps back. Heading for the cliff while going backwards.

10. Politics seems to be on my mind a lot. I think it's like that evil vine in a horror movie I watched as a little kid with my mother. The vines took over and even wiggled into people's homes strangling them while they ate pudding.

11. I don't often eat pudding.

12. The current (Jan 9 2017) president has intelligence, heart, class, humor and dignity. The next guy isn't worthy of shining his shoes never mind filling them.

13. I think there's something called mass hypnotism going on. It affects people who lack empathy. Those not affected by it are standing around feeling like their in an alternate dimension in a horror movie. Canadians are watching the movie yelling at the screen but not being heard.

14. The writer in me develops plot... "Man wants to be president of the United States, but knows he would never be elected because he's boring and nobody cares about him. So he gets on the same ticket as a successful psychopath buffoon who has a following of other psychopaths.  Buffoon wins presidency making man vice-president. Buffoon gets sworn in. Assassination attempt at inauguration thwarted. So is back up attempts. Man gets frustrated. Comes up with other plans. Prison? Impeachment? Murder? Man becomes president.

15. I have to declutter my house this year because I'm moving. Throwing out everything that does not make me feel joy. The pots, the pans, the toilet bowl cleaner. Books, crafts, movies and music get to move with me. The apocalypse may come and I want to be prepared in case I can't leave my new home.

16. It's minus 100 out there. I need a beach. Or at least a rainy day in England. How about a sunny day in Italy and a handsome Italian man? Okay, how about John Stamos in Greece?

17. I am too fat for John Stamos. Sigh.

18. Now I want chocolate.

19. I could be a brilliant successful novelist. Too bad I can't convince anyone else of that.

20. Time to watch another episode of Supernatural, the show that proves that handsome men have nine lives - or in Dean's case well over a hundred.


Yarnsong (Maggie) said...

🌷 Not a rainy day in England, here's a tulip from Holland. Let the random thoughts roll!

Lady In Read said...

loved these random thoughts.. and found myself nodding my head saying yes!